A TRIP to FRIPP - The Baby’s First Trip at The Beach….Positivity Spreads Across Generations!

(Annie, Lisa, and I are walking on the beaches at Hunting Island State Park. You can see the tip of the famous lighthouse in the background.) 

I count each additional day that I get to spend time with my daughter, Annabelle, to be a precious blessing. Her smiles cause my heart to freeze with joy each time I sense her evident happiness.

Life is short, and as humans, we often become what we concentrate our attention on the most. For instance, if I constantly complain about trivial details in my life, then I will probably have a slightly negative disposition towards my life. On the other hand, if I speak positively of every circumstance in my life, then naturally I will probably love life, even amid tragedies. There is good to be found in every situation if you seek the good things you wish for. We become what our thoughts most dwell on, psychologically, emotionally, and perhaps even spiritually.

Life potentially develops into what you expect will happen. And of course, sometimes the unexpected happens but not necessarily in a bad way. If we ask God to bless us, then we can optimistically expect those requests to come to fruition. Believe they will occur. I speak these life wishes into verbal statements of self-affirmation over and over and over again. You transform yourself into the thoughts you give the most attention to, positive or negative sentiments.

Like the positive person I hope Annabelle continues to be through her continual giggles and smiles, she probabilistically emulates the people she spends the most time with, her parents. For the first time this past week, Annabelle experienced the feel of beach sand, a lighthouse climb of multiple stairs, and her feet against ocean waves. I choose to focus my attention on her first nervous steps in the cold waves (positive), rather than the observation that the weather was not exactly ideal (negative). I hope to fixate on my rare moments with family I only see a couple of times a year (positive), rather than some of their relative tendencies to slightly annoy me (negative).

While partaking in my beach vacation, for instance, I was given a brief lecture on how Lisa and I should be raising Annabelle. I have noticed that many folks willingly give advice, even when not requested. If a cynic focuses only on cynical commentary, then their continual self-indulgent need to give advice will neither come across as positive or constructive. It is just painful on the ears forced to listen. Hence James 1:19 reminds us of the following: “My dear brothers and sisters, take note of this: Everyone should be quick to listen, slow to speak, and slow to become angry.”

I hope Annabelle is raised to realize, live, and know the humility of when to listen and when to speak (thriving with a James 1:19 mentality). Walking on the beach provides a majestic opportunity to listen to the crashes of waves and the voices of nature with seagulls soaring in a place called home, meaning Fripp Island, South Carolina. My family has journeyed to Fripp Island every summer for the last 50 years, not missing one year in that streak. This continual tradition is quite an impressive blessing! I gasp in the awes of island sunsets and beach sunrises in this marvelous place on an annual basis.     

I will acknowledge and concentrate on the fact that each new year at Fripp Island is better than the previous one. My positive mentality in the present will actively transform into my positive mentality for the future. Each day that passes can be better than the previous day. I suppose it is just a matter of how you look at life and the present moment you live in. What do you give most of your mental attention to? Because that focused energy will be the force you generate throughout your life, positive or negative, optimistic or cynical. I hope that Annabelle lives with moments at Fripp Island where her Daddy laughs and smiles more than anyone else in the room with true joy. The sand between my toes is the positive sensation I will remember and give thanks for as my daughter builds her first sandcastles.

I am no longer the glass-half-empty kind of guy. Annabelle helps me be a glass-half-full father for the future. She constantly reminds me of what is most important in life, experienced memories, a relationship with Jesus, and family.

And of course, here at some of our favorite photographed moments with Annabelle at Fripp Island.

(Annie with G-Daddy on the beach, my father.)

(Annie and her first steps in the ocean water on the beach.)

(Annie, Lisa, and me before dinner at The Bonita Boathouse, restaurant at Fripp Island Marina.) 

(Annie with CeeCee at the Lost Local Restaurant in downtown Beaufort, South Carolina, my mom.)

(Annie on the beach with G-Daddy, Aunt Susan, and Cousin Madison.) 

(Annie inside the beach tent with Lisa and me. It was cold and windy on this day.)

(Annie wakes up at the beach house in the morning. Mornings are usually the time for her best, cheerful moods….a.k.a. fun to be around.)

#daddydestinations #daddy #dad #blog #family #DaddiesAndDaughters #destinations #memories #story #narrative #inspiration #JamesCartee

What did you do this weekend? We Drift. We Moonshine. We Hike! (with insights on honor and commitment)….

The following memory resurfaced on my Facebook feed this week from eleven years ago, which seemed ironic given what happened to me these last few weeks.

James Cartee

“Do people come through? That is the nature of what should define a friendship. If someone brings drama or negativity in the slightest to the table, is that someone you want to spend valuable energy, insight, and time pouring into? I also believe a person is defined by their word. If you make a commitment, perhaps it is best to stick to it or not commit at all. Sometimes "No" really is the simplest answer.”

I desire for my legacy to mean something significant to the people around me when I pass away, especially in terms of how Annabelle views her father and even talks about me with other people. Just to note, Annabelle was not riding in any of the cars seen drifting here in these clips.

I was recently speaking with an old friend who has since retired from an established career of teaching Communication in higher education, and she mentioned that I was “growing up.” It only took me almost forty years to do so. But I am okay with that. When raising a daughter, I often reflect on my humanity and the lessons I learn in my journey with God and family by my side.

First, I eventually hope that Annabelle speaks about her family with fondness and excitement in the adventures that we live through together. I am not one to typically condone hours of watching television, playing Pokémon cards, or video gaming while life passes by in real moments that we could share together. On this particular Saturday, these race cars were filmed drifting, and we also drank moonshine (obviously not Annabelle). We ate a late lunch of fine dining at Cracker Barrel. And we ended the day with a beautiful hike at Seven Days Birdwatching State Park, near the French Broad River and the Smoky Mountains National Park.

Second, I hope that Annabelle learns the importance of keeping her word when she commits herself to something of importance, even if that something is only important to the person originally committed to. I recently had a friend bail on me with an event of personal importance to go work “an optional extra shift” with a job, not to mention I had paid out of pocket for his admittance into the game. He brushed it off like it was no big deal, yet it was a big deal to me! Today’s generation (probably me included at times) flakes through commitments with no real consideration for other people. The focus on myself has become the priority over serving your fellow man or woman sitting or standing next to you. 

Third, to clarify, it is not that self-image is ultimately the most important thing to me. It is the person and standard someone sets him or herself up to be that instead is paramount to me. In other words, you can be the fool, or you can be the person people respect and depend on. I desire for Annabelle to think about how her actions, thoughts, and commitments influence the people around her, from the way she dresses to the way she speaks with and to other people. Her depicted persona reflects upon this family, and I hope she understands the last name Cartee carries weight in the honor it represents to her father and others.

Keeping a person’s word and the value of honor might be an old-fashioned ideal to some. My wish remains that Annabelle respects keeping her word and honors those around her with a swagger that inspires. As the old saying goes, it is not always what you say that speaks of the person you are. It is what you do that defines what a person is about. 

Personal life lesson reminders for Annabelle, Lisa, and I – Don't be a flake!

Keep your word when given!

Let your “Yes’s” be true “Yes’s”!

Let your “No’s” be true “No’s”!

Live honorably in a way that esteems all your family members, especially our parents and grandparents before us. Respect is not freely given. It is earned!

If you devote your time, resources, and energy to any relationship, my wish and prayer for you is that your devotion to these priorities brings forth fruit for many years to come!

Here are some of the latest Annabelle pictures, including our recent hike, when the mountains called me home again.

#daddydestinations #daddy #dad #blog #family #DaddiesAndDaughters #destinations #memories #story #narrative #inspiration #JamesCartee

The Mountains Are Calling, and Annabelle Must Go!

“Keep close to Nature's heart... and break clear away, once in a while, and climb a mountain or spend a week in the woods. Wash your spirit clean.” -John Muir

At the university I currently attend for my PhD. in Communication, leadership removed all holiday and/or spring breaks to reduce travel with the student population. Research suggests that students perform better with exercise and recreational activities with semester breaks, in addition to receiving much-needed rest and quality time with family members. Due to these unfortunate situations, my wife, Lisa, and I recently traveled to take a long weekend in Ellijay, Georgia so I could have a short break from reality and responsibility. Ellijay is located in North Georgia along the Blue Ridge Parkway and near the southern route starting point of the Appalachian Trail.

Of course, Annabelle accompanied us, which really made the trip all the more enjoyable with some of her first moments in nature. Over the next few months, we will continue to involve Annabelle in outdoor pursuits. Some might say parents inspire children by what they say. Perhaps, better said and even more impactful, parents inspire children by what they do. If travel and outdoor recreation remain a natural priority for Mom and Dad, then perhaps that love for these activities will also become a priority for their kids.

Ellijay encompasses a small mountain community with a centralized town square that the Cartecay River flows through and vineyard country surrounds (Cartecay Vineyards, Ott Farms and Vineyard, Ellijay River Vineyards, etc.). Backpacker culture and nature lovers inhabit the town with a common enthusiasm for the great outdoors. The main street and township square comprises of unique clothing boutiques, locally-owned restaurants, outfitters, and other small shopping establishments.   

As a family together, in rainy weather, we hiked with Annabelle against my chest in a knapsack carrier. We ate on two occasions in a tavern bar in downtown Ellijay (River Street Tavern), both visits Annabelle happened to sleep through. We also visited a microbrewery where a live band asked me to rap with a pure beat of the drum (Cartecay River Brewing Company). I politely declined. We drank wine fireside with an acoustic set at a vineyard, making new friends with a couple from Savannah, Georgia. My family experienced a few adventures in this beautiful town with our daughter involved the entire time.

The mountains of Appalachia continue to teach and remind me of some valuable life lessons. First, one cannot always be in a rush. Today’s society pushes for a go-every-second mentality. You will miss the very moment in front of you if not careful to stop and catch your breath. On a beautiful hike, soak in the scenery around you. Absorb the stillness of nature. Stand in awe of your surroundings.

Second, let go of the dead weight. You will often hear serious backpackers mention their ultralight gear or their total weight carried on the trail. In fact, many adventurists get rid of things they realize are not needed on a long thru-hike. Sometimes you have to let go of the bad things in life. Rid yourself of the pressing unimportant things that we give too much attention to. It might be a negative relationship. It might be something materialistic. That dead weight might be the constant self-nagging in which you beat yourself up for no reason. Drop the dead weight! Continue on your journey and keep moving forward!

Third, embrace the journey and forget about the destination. Most admire attained goals, reaching for finish lines, and seeking long-sought-after accomplishments. However, the present minute you live in realistically defines who you are at the end of the journey. Our destinations often change. The hard moments define our grit to persevere when challenges come our way. Then, like endurance athletes, we eventually reach that destination, and then we become ready for the next adventure. Make the moments count because all the little moments along the way ultimately define the journey itself and whether all the sacrifices made were worthwhile.

Yes, the mountains speak to us! We just have to listen to remind ourselves of the simple truths we may already know down deep within. Even though the semester has been greatly altered compared to a traditional college calendar year, I received a break, and I am grateful. Most importantly, I created memories in the common passions I hope, over time, Annabelle also develops a love for. When the mountains call her, I, indeed, hope she will go! 

Here are some of the latest Annabelle pictures including our recent getaway when the mountains called me home.

#daddydestinations #daddy #dad #blog #family #DaddiesAndDaughters #destinations #memories #story #narrative #inspiration #JamesCartee

Rest - Taking Time to Appreciate the Time We Have….

The Lord replied, “My Presence will go with you, and I will give you rest." 

Exodus 33:14

Rest is an essential part of life, and rest necessitates our personal attention as a priority for mental and spiritual health reasons. How many times have you ignored your body’s natural signs to take a break? I know I have. For some reason, I often feel a strong need to get one more task on my to-do list completed when it can probably wait until the next day. I put that pressure on myself. I am the only person who can alleviate this stressful, overbearing feeling by taking a moment to rest.

I can decide to center myself one more time for rest and recollection of what matters most, or I can stress over the completion of one more task. Through prayer, meditation, writing, taking a walk, and sleeping, I try to remember what truly is important to me. Those first strong reminders would be my own family, especially Lisa, my wife, and Annabelle, my baby girl, and additionally my relationship with Jesus.

With quality family time, several jobs, four courses full-time as a Ph.D. student, church activities, and exercising regularly, I struggle to keep up with everything I think I "need to do." More often than not these things can wait. They do not need to be done right this second.

Sometimes these things should wait so I can rest right now. Then I will recharge and perhaps have more energy to focus on the tasks at hand, thus completing them faster than originally intended.

In my last moment, when I die, I am probably not going to remember when I finished that last tedious difficult project. Typically one does not say, “I sure am glad I got my grocery shopping done.” Or perhaps, “Man, I am glad I took out the trash, so my house does not stink.” No, you will remember times with family, spiritual break-through moments with God, and once-in-a-lifetime trips around the world. No one says, “I am glad I got my chores done before this final second.”

Holding my daughter while she sees bison gallop across the plains of Yellowstone for the first time will be what I remember. Perhaps it will be the first time she feels, tastes, and plays in the snow, or a blog entry that touches the lives of my readers. It probably will not be my latest academic research study I am bragging to angels about when I go to heaven. I think you get the idea.

I challenge you to relax for a moment. Take a deep breath. Thank God for the present moment you currently live in. Drink your favorite microbrewery cold beer and chill out on the beach with toes in the sand. Show yourself grace because grace in the God-sized memories will be what you remember when you go home to heaven, not those regular mundane everyday tasks. Remember what you truly believe matters right now. What matters to me is that Annabelle also creates her God-sized moments. Focus on these things in the present. What truly makes you happy in your most joyous times today? Remember you have a legacy to live and a legacy to leave behind for those who really know you. What will others say or remember about the person you are? What will your own personal thoughts be on your final day?

Here are some of the latest Annabelle photos for your viewing enjoyment.

#daddydestinations #daddy #dad #blog #family #DaddiesAndDaughters #destinations #memories #story #narrative #inspiration #JamesCartee

Loving and Appreciating Life As It Is Right Now (Lisa and Annabelle Included)…..

“I thank my God always concerning you for the grace of God which was given to you by Christ Jesus.” 1 Corinthians 1:4 (NKJV)

I was recently challenged by a fellow author to write about a person I love, near the time of Valentine’s Day. And of course, naturally those two people to describe in this manner would be my wife and daughter, Lisa and Annabelle. In addition to adoring my two best ladies, should I not also love the life that I have been given in the present hour? In other words, as Christians, we could choose to love each day while the current moment happens right now, this very minute, this very second. Taking our additional days for granted, we journey through life, expecting another day to come tomorrow as if no big deal. Of course, there are no guarantees that the next day will come.

With recent events in my life, I have really been trying to appreciate my time with family and friends, or maybe even just completing simple tasks. I get to do these things instead of thinking about these things as a boring agenda item to knock off my to-do list. In fact, there are talents that I possess that I even take for granted simply by the ease of doing them. For example, I am great at school (working on my doctorate). I write well. And I grade many assignments in an efficient, productive, positive manner, which might take someone else much more time to do so. When you are good at an activity, even if you find it monotonous at times (sitting at a computer for hours), try not to take it for granted. This activity might take someone else several hours to do what you do in a shorter amount of time.

While our daughter entered the world in August last year, which turned out to be the best blessing ever, Lisa and I also experienced many losses this year – two aunts, a former boss, a great uncle, a grandmother, an uncle’s mother, another uncle’s mother, a friend’s son who we know through church, and even some others I cannot recall right now. Some of these loved ones suffered greatly, and while it might sound self-focused, I am glad to be healthy. I took a walk today. I can eat good food from a grocery store or decent restaurant. I go to the gym several days a week. I can afford the gym membership to go work out. The blessings keep unfolding as I could spend hours writing them down.

Perhaps these are the details we should focus our energy on. Life is precious. Even though I work more than I would like to sometimes, I seek to enjoy my life in case my end is soon coming. Not to say that it is, however the days go by fast. And we have been given a chance to live this very present moment. That is no small thing. So, while I love my girls, I also want to make sure I love my life as it is right now.

While Valentine’s Day might be the cheesiest special occasion of the year, if you can, try to love everything about your life circumstances, not just one or two things. Only then will you truly be content.

Lisa and Annabelle, I love you! Happy Valentine’s Day!

-James L. Cartee, III

Here are some of the latest Annabelle photos for your viewing enjoyment.

#daddydestinations #daddy #dad #DaddiesAndDaughters #daughters #family #blog #destinations #memories #story #narrative #inspiration #JamesCartee

A Reminder of God’s Grace for Fathers - Snorkeling with Manatees….

This January I traveled to Crystal River, Florida and snorkeled with manatees in their wild habitat within the natural springs located there. I snorkeled one day in Crystal River and a second day in Homosassa, each location having its own population of manatees hiding from the cold waters in the Gulf of Mexico. Manatees come inland into the warm springs because they cannot live for long periods of time in cold water or tolerate temperatures lower than 68 degrees Fahrenheit (Save the Manatee Club, 2021).  

When a manatee approaches a human snorkeling in the water with curiosity and no fear, there is something magical about their snotty kiss on your scuba goggles that fogs up your vision. In these waters, manatee respect and etiquette dictate that you do not reach out to the animal but rather let it come to you. Once an animal is literally a few inches from you, you cannot help but touch it, and like a dog, some manatees want to play in the water and receive a good back scratching.

While it might sound very simplistic, a manatee’s demeanor in the water reminds me of the nature of God. Boat motors mangle these creatures with their sharp propellers, more often than not due to the negligence of the person steering the boat. Boaters often ignore the protected safe zones and the legal warnings that request neutral idle speeds in shallow waters, including the Floridian springs. Regardless of the harm done, sometimes with the innocence of a child, a manatee will still bless a human with its presence without any malicious intent. Grace is given, and nothing (action or gift) is requested in return.

God’s gift to humanity in salvation works the very same way. God expects nothing in return but surrender and faith in the sacrifice of His Son, Jesus Christ. His grace flows through the Holy Spirit into our souls and bodies to act as a testimony to the world for His good will and His good purposes. All God asks is that our hearts be given to Him in faith with our steps moving forward….nothing more….and nothing less.

As the father of Annabelle, I can learn much from the manatees and the beauty of God’s wild creation. In fact, we should treat all the animals and sea creatures of His creation with the same reverence we do humans. When individuals hurt or kill an animal with malice, illogical reasoning, it emotionally unnerves me (i.e. illegal poaching, neglecting pets, hunting out of season, etc.)! Who, in their right mind, would do such activities without respect for the animals?!?! In my own international travels, I have heard that shark oil has magical properties, the tusks of an elephant bring good fortunes, and ingredients from a tortoise make multi-thousand-dollar perfumes. Of course, these stories all seem like dysfunctional, irrational behaviors. Again, how cowardly can a person be to harm a defenseless animal?!?! If a person truly respected God’s creation, there would be a veneration for all living things, not simply to indulge in mistaken, misguided intentions, selfishness, and beliefs.

For anyone who has felt the kiss and warmth of a manatee’s gentle nature, there would be no malice in the heart of such an encounter. And for a God who works for the good of all who profess the name of Jesus, no malice will come our way. Yes, I will remember my wonderful days in those warm springs! I will remember the lessons of grace shown to me by the manatees, and as Annabelle’s father, I will pass those lessons down onto her as well.

“Praise the Lord from the earth,
    you great sea creatures and all ocean depths,
lightning and hail, snow and clouds,
    stormy winds that do his bidding,
you mountains and all hills,
    fruit trees and all cedars,
wild animals and all cattle,
    small creatures and flying birds,
kings of the earth and all nations,
    you princes and all rulers on earth,
young men and women,
    old men and children.
Let them praise the name of the Lord,
    for his name alone is exalted;
    his splendor is above the earth and the heavens.”

    -Psalm 148:7-13

Works Cited List

Save The Manatee Club (2021). Migration. https://www.savethemanatee.org/manatees/migration/#:~:text=Manatees%20need%20warm%20water%20to,for%20long%20periods%20of%20time.

#daddydestinations #daddy #dad #blog #family #DaddiesAndDaughters #destinations #memories #story #narrative #inspiration #JamesCartee

The Pause of The Great Conjunction: A Poem Dedication to Annabelle Merci

As many of you know, I often write poetry, and many of my poems have traditionally been published in small book collections. These stanzas below show the first poem I have now written about Annabelle, my daughter. My family often inspires my best heartfelt words in original written literature. After all, family should be one of the greatest sources of our own inspiration. I suspect future poems about Annabelle will continue, however for now, please enjoy this first one.   

The Pause of The Great Conjunction:

A Dedication to Annabelle Merci

The sunsets pause in the great conjunction
Of a Christmas star that shines
Through the universe to remind me
That my dearest Annabelle lives today.
        And only today can I cherish her.
             
This first poem of many dedications
Serves to honor my precious Annie
Who makes all moments stand still
In the beauty of her sweet smile.
 
Green eyes glimmer in window sunrays
Of a nursery fresh in the morning
Where baby smells touch the soul
In the small whispers for Daddy’s comfort.
 
Children remind us of the miracle we call life
To remember the moments of here
And now in the reality before us
With hands pressed together on humble knees.
 
The smooth moment of surrender
Creates trust in the plan that unfolds
As God intended in the grander schemata
Of my own gray-colored skies.
 
Children pause in common junctures with time
So we reminisce grateful prayers
And creative passions of music
Streaming with our spirits in the days to come.
 
However today is all we have
And all we must realize in the presence
Of a father’s child whose cheek demands
Another soft kiss in the shaped memories.
 
The sunsets pause in the great conjunction
Of a Christmas star that shines
Through the universe to remind me
That my dearest Annabelle lives today
        And only today can I cherish her.
             
-James L. Cartee III, 12/29/20

You can view the latest pictures of my beautiful Annabelle below.

#daddydestinations #daddy #dad #blog #family #DaddiesAndDaughters #destinations #memories #story #narrative #inspiration #poetry #poem